Mary Ann or Ginger?
Gilligan’s Island lasted all of three seasons on TV but it gave rise to one of the most vexing questions faced by young men, even now. Given the choice, which of the two young female characters, Mary Ann or Ginger would you choose? Mary Ann, the wholesome Kansas girl, squeaky clean and pretty or Ginger, the flamboyant actress of blinding beauty, sheath ball gowns and large breasts?
Of course, the choice has to be made in the context of, once chosen, where are you and your selection headed and for how long.
If the plan was to head for a long weekend at an upscale hotel in Coral Gables, Ginger would be the perfect choice. Ginger, it was clear, had been around, knew what was what and knew where what was in the dark. To get to that portion of the weekend would likely require only a pleasant meal and a drink or three.
Taking Mary Ann to Coral Gables intending to spend the weekend together in flagrant violation of her virginity would require an engagement ring, a firm wedding date, a vow of undying love and faithfulness until forever and seven strong cocktails. By then, your what is what probably wouldn’t function. What?
If, on the other hand, you were headed straight to her parents’ house to ask for her hand in marriage, Ginger would be a poor choice. First, her parents don’t live together anymore and each one has been through two other spouses since Ginger left home at 13 for a modeling career. It wouldn’t be clear who you would ask. Besides, Ginger, doesn’t need no “stinking permission”, she’s already been married and sorta still is.
Mary Ann’s family, on the other hand, are all together on a Kansas sugar beet farm and her Pa sure as hell wants to check you out before you go pokin’ around Mary Ann’s knickers, even if you are legally married at the time. Besides, taking Ginger home to meet your parents could get you written out of the will. Mary Ann poses no such problem.
So, as the reader can see, the Mary Ann or Ginger question continues to vex.
The Clown is sorry to report that Mary Ann, a.k.a. Dawn Wells, has died, one of nearly 350,000 Americans taken by the hoax COVID-19. For an elitist-pushed scam, created by the libs in order to get more money for black and brown people from real American white people, COVID-19 is doing one helluva convincing impression.
Loeffler or Warnock?
Just another binary choice.
For those of you unlucky enough to have completely finished your voting for 2020, I’m pleased to report that the Clown resides in Georgia and that you can vicariously enjoy the coming run-off election for two U.S. Senate seats by following along. It will be in all the papers. This assumes that any of my hip, up-to-date readers actually read a newspaper between Twitter, Instagram, Facebook and QAnon sessions.
As many of you know, any Georgia election is rife with fraud and if there is anything the Clown likes more than committing fraud, it’s trafficking in children and pedophilia.
Thanks to our republican Governor, Brian Kemp, and his evil sidekick, republican Secretary of State, Brad Raffensperger, registered Democrats can vote multiple times in any election. The Clown has cast multiple ballots for Democrats Raphael Warnock and Jon Ossoff. He’s voted as “The 13th Clown”, T. 13th Clown”, “T.T. Clown”, “The Clown”, “The T. Clown” and “T. 13th Clown”. Very handy, as you are allowed to do this in one visit to the mailbox.
Further, the Democratic Party of Georgia sent the Clown a list of 20 dead Georgians for whom he cast ballots for the Democratic contenders and here’s the irony, most of those dead people had been republicans in life. Heh, heh, heh.
Added to this strategy is the fact that our voting machines are made by Dominion, Inc. a wholly-owned subsidiary of Hugo Chavez’s estate in Venezuela, an entity that is paying both Kemp and Raffensperger gobs of money to allow the machines, via their software algorithm, to change republican votes to Democratic votes. Even better, as reported by always reliable Dick Morris and then re-tweeted by the always reliable Donald Trump, Brad Raffensperger’s brother, Ron, is the chief technology officer for the Chinese tech storage firm, Huawei, although its exact relationship to Dominion, Hugo Chavez, and Brad Raffensperger is not immediately clear.
When asked about her other son, Ron, Brad Raffensperger’s mother was confused. “I don’t recall Ron. I thought that I was familiar with my four children, given the nine months of pregnancy for each and then, of course, their childhoods. Ron must have slipped through somehow. Very strange. Perhaps I should call Dick Morris. He can probably explain.”
Regardless of how the Tuesday run-off election turns out, the massive voter fraud will either work or it won’t. If it doesn’t work, it is likely because the republicans, except Kemp and Raffensperger, Brad, not Ron, have successfully rallied the evangelicals to pray the demons out of the voting machines and to invalidate all of the mail-in ballots. Divine intervention is the last best hope.
Observoid of the Day: Not wearing a mask saves the expense of buying an “I’m a Complete Idiot” T-shirt.